Why You Feel Lost in a Loveless World: Franz Kafka and the Cost of Being Human
Lessons from The Metamorphosis on Self-Worth, Modern Life, and the Danger of Losing Yourself
Franz Kafka is one of the most fascinating writers and philosophers of the 20th century. He was born in Prague in 1883 and lived a life that often felt out of place, with a regular job during the day and a passion for writing that he pursued quietly, often in the shadows.
Although his stories seem surreal and unusual on the surface, they explore something deeply human: the struggle to find meaning, to be understood, and to stay connected in a world that feels cold and indifferent.
His most famous works include The Trial, The Castle, and The Metamorphosis. All of these books explore themes like isolation, loss of identity, the pressures of modern life, and the systems that shape and sometimes crush us.
Metamorphosis
All of these themes come together in his most famous and perhaps most heartbreaking work, The Metamorphosis. It’s short, but it says so much. And at the center of it is Gregor Samsa.
The story begins with Gregor waking up to find he’s turned into a giant insect. His body is hard and armored, his legs are tiny, and he can’t speak. But instead of freaking out, his first thought is, “How am I going to get to work?”
That’s classic Kafka. Even in the middle of something so bizarre, Gregor is more worried about missing work than what’s happening to him.
Soon, we learn that he’s the only one supporting his family. He hates his job, and his boss is a tyrant, but he has no choice. His parents and sister depend on him. But now, as a bug, he can’t work. He can’t even get out of bed properly.
When he finally reveals himself, everyone’s horrified. His manager runs off, his parents are terrified, and things go downhill fast. Gregor becomes a burden. He’s shut inside his room.
At first, his sister brings him food, but it’s more out of duty than care. Slowly, the family stops seeing him as a person. Even his sister, the one who was kindest to him, eventually says, “We need to get rid of it.”
Notice, not him — it.
Gregor dies alone in that room. And when it happens, no one cries. His family doesn’t mourn. They’re just relieved. The next morning, they head out to enjoy the day and talk about moving on. It’s like he never existed.
On the surface, it’s a strange little story — but beneath it lies a powerful truth. Kafka is holding up a mirror, asking us to take a hard look at ourselves and the world around us.
Your Value Shouldn’t Depend on What You Produce
Kafka says, “He was a tool of the boss, without brains or backbone, and he was proud of that.”
In The Metamorphosis, when Gregor wakes up and finds out he’s turned into a bug, he doesn’t panic about losing his human body. Instead, his first thought is about work. He’s worried about being late.
It’s as if he hasn’t just become an insect on the outside, but has gone through a deeper transformation — from a human being to a human doing.
Kafka uses Gregor’s inner thoughts to show how Gregor sees himself. He doesn’t think his worth comes from who he is, but from the work he does. His job is what defines him — not his values, not his personality.
And it’s not just how he sees himself. Everyone else around him sees him the same way. The moment he’s no longer useful, even his own family begins to treat him like a burden.
They’re not horrified just because he looks like a bug. They’re horrified because he can no longer provide.
But this isn’t just Gregor’s story — it’s the story of our society too. In today’s world, especially under capitalism, a person’s worth is often measured by their job title, salary, or how much they can provide.
If you can’t earn or contribute, it’s like your value goes down. People stop seeing you the same way.
Kafka shows us how dangerous this mindset can be. He reminds us that basing your entire self-worth on your work is not only unhealthy — it’s inhuman.
So what’s the alternative?
Kafka suggests that our value should come from who we are — not what we do. Our worth shouldn't be tied only to our jobs or how much we produce. It should come from our values, our personality, and how we treat others.
Don’t Let Modern Life Dehumanize You
To quote Kafka: “I am a cage, in which the song is held prisoner.”
Gregor is so caught up in his work that nothing else seems to matter. Even after waking up and realizing he’s turned into a bug, his first worry isn’t about his body or what’s happened to him — it’s about how he’ll get to work and keep providing for his family.
But this isn’t just Gregor’s problem. It’s something many of us deal with today.
Work has become the center of our lives. We let our jobs define who we are, often forgetting that we’re more than just what we do to earn a living.
Kafka is warning us: this way of living is dangerous. Over time, it can wear us down and make us feel like we’re not even human anymore.
He encourages us to ask: Who am I outside of work?
Start by finding what lights you up inside — something that has nothing to do with money or productivity.
Ask yourself: What do I enjoy just for the sake of it? What makes me feel more like myself?
Write down your top three activities that bring you joy — maybe writing, painting, walking in nature, or reading. Then do one of them every other day. Start small. No pressure.
This is how you start remembering who you are.
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Don’t Try to Please Everyone
In Kafka’s words: “The truest strength is to stand firm in your authenticity, even if it means standing alone.”
Gregor never asked for anything. He worked hard, gave everything to his family, and never complained. But the moment he couldn’t provide anymore, they abandoned him.
Kafka is reminding us: when your value depends on pleasing others, that love is usually conditional.
You can’t make everyone happy. The more you try to, the more you chip away at who you really are.
Start by understanding the difference between kindness and people-pleasing. Kindness has boundaries. People-pleasing usually comes from fear.
Ask yourself: Where am I giving too much just to be liked?
Then start saying no — not out of cruelty, but out of self-respect. Every no to something that drains you is a yes to yourself.
Don’t Trade Your Identity for Acceptance
According to Kafka: “Authenticity is the only currency worth keeping; trade it not for fleeting approval.”
Gregor never truly had a voice — even before his transformation. He just filled a role.
We do the same. We put on masks to fit in. We shrink our dreams to sound practical.
Kafka warns us: if you live your life pretending to be someone else, one day you’ll wake up and not recognize yourself at all.
So ask yourself: Who am I when no one’s around?
Start small. Speak your mind. Show your quirks. Do what lights you up. That’s how you reclaim your voice.
Protect Your Inner World
Kafka says, “Guard the sanctuary of your soul; it is the secret well of your resilience and peace.”
Even as Gregor is rejected, something inside him stays alive. His room becomes a space where he can hold on to the last bit of who he really is.
Your inner world is sacred.
In today’s noise, protect it. Be picky with what you allow in. Choose people and ideas that nourish you. Make time for silence, reflection, and things that bring you peace.
That’s how you stay grounded. That’s how you stay you.
If you found value in Kafka’s message, remember this: You are more than your job. You are more than what others expect of you. And you are always worth knowing.
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